Placentas and The First Milk

***Warning: This post is pretty grotesque.***

I recently learned that there are women who after giving birth, eat their placentas. Ew. Apparently, the most common way is to add a small amount to a daily smoothie. Again, Ew. There is even a new science which puts it into pill form. Someone apparently didn't like how it tasted. New health studies show that it helps significantly with post-partum depression...I think that is because you are so distracted by what you are eating each day, that you forget to be sad. (That was a joke).

You may be asking yourself what this has to do with my Peace Corps service here in Morocco. It doesn't really. I just made it a part of it when I couldn't drop my new found discovery.

You see, when I heard this was happening, I began a series of e-mails back and forth with my Mom in the USA. I was dumbfounded. And of course I wanted to know if she ate mine or my brothers...apparently it is a new post-natal dietary trend, so no she did not eat any of our placentas. Phew.

The e-mails went back and forth for a few days, with placenta related stories and inappropriate jokes. And then there was the knock on my door. It was my landlady, Mama. I'd told her a few weeks back that when their pregnant cow goes into labor to come knock on my door, I've never seen a cow give birth and I thought why not put it on my bucket list. Sadly, when Mama came knocking, the cow had already given birth so I have yet to witness a baby cow come crawling out of another cow. I think I am mildly relieved though. After I requested her to get me when the time comes, I Googled 'cow birth' and was pretty disgusted. I know it's a miracle and all, but Ew.

Mama was in her kitchen when she heard the tiny 'moos' and she says it is the first time she's ever had a cow give birth without her assistance. So there she was standing in my doorway inviting me to come see the new calf. She kept making sucking faces which was pretty funny, I guess she thought I'd never seen a baby animal feed from its mother before either.

So upon her orders, I grabbed my camera and made my way to her house. While taking pictures of the baby calf feeding, I started coughing. And that's where it all went wrong. Mama remembered that I was sick ( I had a cold/flu last week) and was on a mission to help me get better.

'Getting better' was to take place in her kitchen. When I got upstairs, I found out just what she had in store for me..."At sue it l'helib amz waru" which unfortunately for me means 'you will drink the cows first milk'...The first milk after it gave birth. And then my brain started to rapidly misfire...All I was getting was "Placenta-You will drink the placenta". I started getting the heebee jeebees and all the hairs on my arms were standing up. Minor panic attack begins.

I thought for a second I was going to be able to wiggle my out of the situation and I politely told Mama that my stomach is not accustomed to milk that hasn't been boiled and that I wouldn't be able to drink the first milk. Mashi mushkil Miriam inwee which means 'no problem Miriam it is cooked'. Great.

She pulled a stainless steel container out of the fridge and began to scoop spoonfuls of what looked like runny-yellow cottage cheese onto a small plate. Thank god the plate was small. At this point my brain is still continuing to misfire and placentas are still the only thing I can think about. Mama pours twice as much sugar as there is cottage cheese stuff on top of the yellow placenta.

I'm now screaming at myself to stop being so ridiculous it's clearly cottage cheese from the 'first milk' and the only true thing of concern is that it is yellow not white. It is not a placenta Miriam, pull yourself together! I'm pretty sure Mama saw me having this internal battle with myself as I can vaguely remember minor gagging, before the spoon was even in my hand.

I ate that entire plate of yellow cottage cheesy stuff topped with a weeks intake of sugar and you know what? It tasted like sugar.

Miriam x